Lindsay – Chapter VI
Saturday, Lindsay cried herself to sleep on the couch. The next morning, Sunday, was equally depressing: it was raining and cold, despite being a summer day. She had been diagnosed with depression months earlier, but she refused to take antidepressant medication. She did not believe it could help her and she was afraid of the side effects.
The doctor explained that the side effects were outweighed by the help of the antidepressants, but he was in no position to force her to take them. Not that he would if he could. Usually, the laws governing mental health mean that as long as a person is competent and not a danger to themselves or others they can make their own decisions.
Lindsay was competent and certainly not a danger to others. However, she had dark thoughts. She contemplated suicide, she just chose to hide it from her doctor. She had multiple suicide attempts, but no serious ones. One thing was clear, she was suffering. The rain kept falling adding to her misery. She clung to life, and at the same time wondered if her life was worth living.
Lindsay Peony flower. Photo by Elena |
Her doctor had said to her that part of her wanted to get better, that’s why she sought help. But there was a part of her that had given up. She often told to herself: “Don’t ever give up on yourself!” But she failed to take her own advice.
To make herself feel better, she poured a large cup of coffee. Since her last apartment had burned down and she had no insurance, she had little more than a couch, a small bed, a coffee maker and few clothes. One of her problems was that she could not go to interviews appropriately dressed. She had suits before, but they were gone and she could not afford to get new ones.
See also:
See also:
Lindsay in her dreams. Photo by Elena |
Lindsay's Toys. Photo by Elena |
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